Lol, Dude. It Literally Doesn’t Matter

I am getting much more cantankerous in my middle age than I ever anticipated I would. My trajectory, if it is to hold, would put me somewhere between JK Simmon’s character in Whiplash and a rabid badger by the time I am 60. I am finding my ability to abide stupidity, hypocrisy and all the other seasonings of human society to be eroding at an alarming pace. One thing, above all, is really irking me since the election on Nov. 5th. I don’t know if the folks I am about to call out have an official title, but for the sake of this piece, I am going to call them fartweasels. Fartweasels, because their opinions and the saccharine, unbelievably lame takes that define their online existence are stinky. Weasels because why not. Who am I referring to? The most insufferable group of people in the American electorate; the middle-way folks. You know the type. The people who post memes and videos and blurbs about how both sides of the political aisle are in cahoots with each other. About how politics is all BS and it is a very small cadre of elites who actually run the proverbial “show” behind the scenes.

What’s the difference, man? Both the dems and republicans are full of shit. We are all screwed!

What unbelievably sage wisdom. I know this is forward, but can you light me on fire and then use the flames to light your cigar? That is how much lower on the intellectual totem pole I am than you. Actually, if you could pee on me to put out the flames, then I think we’d really have something here. Nostradamus, The Oracle at Delphi, Einstein, Aquinas… all mouth-breathing sludge donkeys compared to you. In fact, when you posted that status, I bet Thomas Payne, Abraham Lincoln, John Adams, etc. rose from their graves and started doing the Macarena. Alexis de Tocqueville cried with pride.

Or, shut up you absolute droog.

Who wakes up and decides to personify Switzerland? More to the point, who then decides to declare their lazy neutrality to the world in order to gain some sort of social currency? Dopes. That’s who. Most Americans are well-aware that our elected leaders couldn’t care less about us. It’s the people that think our legislators care about anything more than their own political ambitions are the ones that are scarily stupid. I will admit that at the local level, most elected folks are interested in actual practical change in their neighborhoods and larger communities. But these people are usually busybody types and who needs that. At the national level, every single politician is an awful scumbag. Even your favorite. Publicly acknowledging something we all know is infuriating. Breaking news: getting dehydrated can lead to a pretty nasty headache, so I don’t condone it.

Look, I loathe amateur activists. But the fact of the matter is that we now live in a culture and time, where everyone feels compelled to explain to their followers and friends on social media how they vote, what they eat, what they read and where they take a shit. So, I do understand why folks who aren’t all that interested in politics would find the middle-road, jaded teenager approach to elections and legislation to be appealing. It gives you a point of view without the added necessity of having skin in the game. You can thumb off all political questions with a rousing “who cares, dude”. But here is the thing: you could simply do that anyway without periodically broadcasting that you are a pupil of the Jeff Spicolian school of American political philosophy. Just ignore the question. Move on. It is a lesson we can all take at times. If we don’t have anything to say about something, there is no shame in saying simply that.

It is ok not to be an expert.

Lol, Dude. It Literally Doesn’t Matter

PRESIDENT TRUMP!(?) or, Calm Down

It is not without a certain flavor of crow in my mouth that I have had to discuss the election results with friends and family. It is only fitting to point out that my amateur analysis of the campaigns and projected outcome of the election was proven to be accurate in only one respect; amateur. Painfully so. In my defense, however, I relied heavily on the polls which had proved to be largely accurate during the primaries.

Now we are seeing protests all over the country. People are actually protesting a legitimate election. This would be as effective as protesting the night when the Sun goes down. I have no problem with peaceful protest and neither should any American. These particular protests are at best, silly. At worst, symptomatic of the larger problem within American society. I assume that it is also a problem among other members of society but as I am a member of American society, I can only really speak for what I personally observe. So what is the problem? This; most Americans, due to their coddled upbringing and the detrimental effects of helicopter parenting, believe that not agreeing with something or someone is more than enough reason for that something or someone to capitulate to their tantrums.

I fought against Trump and will continue to be skeptical of his motivations until he proves me wrong. I still think the man is an absolute buffoon. I still think that the majority of his supporters were willing to trade dignity for rage. I still think he was as poor a choice as Hillary for President. However, I am also aware that no one cares what I think. I am fine with that. This is because I was brought up in a time right before the generation of, ‘if I think it, it must be so because mommy said I was special.’ So, I am laying out the following list of things that still hold true regardless of who had won the election and things that I am still concerned with. I do this with full knowledge that all three of you who read this blog will either agree or disagree. I am fine with either.

  1. Donald Trump’s election makes the United States look awful in the eyes of the world, especially Europe.
  2. I do not care about what the United States looks like in the eyes of the world, especially Europe.
  3. Alex Jones is still an unhinged lunatic who is the media equivalent of the guy who sets up a ‘5 Dollar a Play’ 3-card monty stand in front of a special-ed school.
  4. God willing, I will never have to hear about Hillary Clinton again and that makes me happy.
  5. Not all of Trump’s supporters are racists.
  6. Not all of Hillary’s supporters are brain-dead.
  7. In four years we get to do this again.
  8. Milo is still spot on about feminism but he is also a caricature who has pulled the wool over the eyes of his followers.
  9. Most people who hate Hillary have Obamacare.
  10. It is highly unlikely for anything that energized Trump’s most questionable supporters will actually happen. See; mass deportations.
  11. The massive hypocrisy being displayed by the left at the moment coupled  with Trump’s more vocal support proves that there is no political, moral high-ground. See; “not my president” signs.
  12. If Lena Dunham leaves the country, all of our lives will be better.
  13. Watching Hollywood go absolutely ape has made this whole thing incredibly entertaining.
  14. Hannity, Ingraham, Mitchell, Coulter etc. were right. But being right doesn’t mean you’re not a laughably transparent shill. Or asshole, if the adjectives are too clunky.
  15. Rejoice! The Young Turks are sad!

Let me leave you, dear reader, with some words of advice. Immediately unfollow, unfriend, block or delete anyone on social media who over the past year has posted any meme featuring R. Lee Ermy or shared any post from that Adonis of man, Brandon Weber. Now that the election is over, we no longer have to suffer fools and reactionaries nor do we have to give them a pass because they were fools and reactionaries during an election.

Put it behind you. It’s finally, thankfully, mercifully over.

PRESIDENT TRUMP!(?) or, Calm Down

Kids, Be Careful With Your Email

Yesterday’s news of the FBI reopening its investigation of Hillary Clinton’s emails begs the question; how much are Americans willing to take before they’ve decided that they’ve had enough?  The answer to that question may be more terrifying than the political landscape in which we currently find ourselves.

Hillary’s diehards have already decided that they couldn’t care less about her emails just as Trump’s diehards have decided that they couldn’t care less about the Constitution. We are entering a cage match. Extremes versus extremes. The independent voter is going to be tasked with deciding the fate of this country and whichever decision they are going to make is wrong. Because our choices are wrong.

I stopped caring about the existence of Bernie Sanders a while ago. He and his droves of drooling Bolsheviks have faded into our national memory. But while I hate to give him any sort of credit and am loathed to admit that I am sorry he dropped out, I must do both. Bernie had the opportunity to change the face of modern American politics. His movement, though laughably misguided and painfully dim, had the sort of momentum that could have translated into the most serious third-party candidacy in recent history. A serious third party run would have legitimized a fourth candidate. Meaning, that if Bernie hadn’t decided to become a typical politician and endorse his enemy after being screwed out of the nomination; we could potentially have had another choice for president. Imagine an actual conservative with a real shot of winning this election. Imagine that. Feels nice, huh?

But we don’t have those options. We have what we have. Americans have to decide whether or not they care about the fact that a potential president is the most corrupt woman on the face of the planet. I doubt the email revelations will do anything to cause a major shift in the momentum of either campaign because people are sick of hearing about her emails. Also, the FBI has been proven to be monumentally disappointing. So, another question that it is to be hoped will be answered soon; are the emails that bad that the FBI felt the need to reopen the investigation or is James Comey trying to save face? I am inclined to believe it is the latter but that still doesn’t make Hillary feel any better or help her chances any more.

Regardless of what other bombshells may fall on both of our esteemed candidates, we’ll have to wait and see on November 8th if any of it meant anything to Americans.

 

Kids, Be Careful With Your Email

It’s Getting Harder to Care

As per usual, I read a story this morning that made me lose a bit of faith in humanity. It should come as no surprise that a PAC would stoop to a level only reserved for the most base and unwholesome. However, this takes the proverbial cake. To summarize; a liberal PAC here in CT took out an ad (which has been removed) on William Petit and other CT Republicans for the misgivings of Donald Trump. Namely; Trump’s derogotory comments about women. What the PAC failed to foresee as an issue with this ad, was the fact that Petit’s wife and two daughters were brutally murdered in a home invasion in 2007.

To suggest that someone doesn’t respect women simply because they are part of the same political party as someone else, would be tantamount to calling all Germans antisemitic. The idea that a man, whose wife and daughters were murdered, doesn’t respect women because of his political allegiance is beyond the pale. This is why I am finding it harder and harder to care. The level to which human beings are willing to degrade themselves in order to press their ideologies is downright depressing. The PAC pulled the ad after heavy pressure from both CT Republicans and Democrats. Regardless of pulling the ad, It doesn’t change the fact that it was created in the first place.

Politics are important for a number of reasons. Perhaps the most important reason being that it reminds us of who we are. Or more to the point, what we can become when reason and integrity take a back seat to ambition and sensationalism. The human spirit is an odd thing. It is the driving force behind every single instance of individual and collective good throughout human history, yet it is so malleable and easy to manipulate. Once a person or group has decided that their politics or worldview is superior to others, any number of indignities are given the chance to crop up. This is not to say that competing ideologies or philosophies are all the same or worth the same. What ideology does brilliantly however, is engage a human being to the point where the individual follower is caught up in a world where cause is greater than self and the two are no longer seperately recognizable. There is nothing inherently wrong with seeing a cause or purpose as more important than oneself. It only becomes a problem when the cause destroys any semblance of the individual’s principles which fueled their zeal at the start. It is not uncommon to meet people who describe their politics before they mention the true pillars of their character; religion, family, charitable work, hobbies etc. We don’t want others to understand us as much as we want them to understand our place in group-think. Human beings have no better outlet to display their natural tribalism than the realm of politics.

We have no one to blame but ourselves. It is easy to insist that the current election season is the worst in American history. Every generation likes to puff itself up. However, the current election and the mudslinging from both sides is a fraction of the horrors found in previous elections. Politics fueling divisive hatred is nothing new and it is certainly not native to the United States. When we feel the creeping sense of disgust rising up in ourselves after learning of attack ads like the one William Petit is attempting to put behind him; what should we do? The obvious answer would be to turn our backs on the more sensationalist pundits and talking heads. But we don’t. As much as we groan about this election and the candidates, anyone who is even remotely political or interested in politics would have to admit that this season has at least been interesting. If not even fun at certain times. So we carefully form our opinions and hone our rage only after we read what our favorite jounralists have to say about it. It seems to me, that when we beat our chests in our own  righteous indignation we ought to hit a little harder. We should punish ourselves for the atrocity of out of control political ideology in this country and the narratives and vitriol it creates. It is our fault.

The next time you read or see something you find abhorrent remember this; They wouldn’t create or publish it, if people didn’t want to see it. Whether or not you personally do, is immaterial to the larger machinery. To clarify;  I didn’t mean to suggest with the title of this post that it is getting harder to care about politics. It is getting harder to care about people. We are always looking for reasons to put our voices out there. Politics are simply the means by which we advance our social philosophies and our voices. Even if they are adopted. Therefore, it is not politics that is to blame for the complete breakdown of anything even remotely akin to propriety or honesty. It is us. So while it is ghoulish to see attack ads claiming that a man who lost his family composed of women is ‘anti-woman’ let’s not pretend that it didn’t give us something to talk or write about.

It’s Getting Harder to Care

Dumpster Fire: Round 1

It was as advertised; a somewhat boring affair with Clinton at her coldest and Trump at a 7 out of 10 on the narcissistic rage scale. Nothing of substance came out of either candidate regardless of the fact that fairly substantive questions were asked. Questions were left unanswered and the best the viewer got out of it lands somewhere between, “what have we done” and “is it too late to pick a couple other candidates?” The best overview / rundown of the night was a single tweet I read which simply stated: “We are talking about birtherism before national security. Let that sink in.”

TRUMP: Breakdown and lasting question

He started strong and brought up the fact that she had been a career politician with little or nothing to show for it. He hammered her record and for a few minutes made her look like a lightweight compared to his tell-it-like-it-is rhetoric. However, that was only after she had brought up the fact that his father facilitated his success with his loan. It shows that he can still be gotten to. His past and his family’s past is his Achilles heel and anything to do with him personally sets him off like a roman candle. His entire appeal among his mainstream followers is the fact that he is not a politician and that he is a business success who seems to be as upset with the direction of the country as they are. What he is overestimating however, is the amount of self-serving grandstanding the on-the-fence voter can handle. The answer remains to be seen in November but I am guessing that answering policy questions with examples of your all-inclusive and racially welcoming golf resorts isn’t going to be something that makes you look like a deep-thinking policy genius. He is going to need to look far more presidential in the next two debates to repair the damage he did to himself last night when it comes to policy and planning. If he can’t beat Hillary in a debate… how can he expect us to believe foreign powers will capitulate to his brand of bluster? Question: How the HELL did he not destroy her on the emails when they had a five-minute back and forth on cyber attacks and the possibility of cyber terrorism? 

CLINTON: Breakdown and lasting question

Woah. It is always interesting to watch a politician lie. It begs the question; how does someone train themselves to be devoid of all feeling? It’s actually impressive. What she lost in the beginning she made up for during the second half of the debate by putting Trump on the defensive. He is not good when he is on the defensive. Now she knows that. No one is really all that good on the defensive. Proof of this fact was seen last night when she simply thumbed over the fact that her email gaffe potentially put America and Americans abroad at risk by saying; “I made a mistake.” What would you expect from the woman who also famously asked what difference it made? She has been in this circus long enough to understand more about policy and the repercussions of policy decision than her opponent. That was made painfully evident by the fact that she is more automaton than human. Her thousand yard stare, forced chuckles and emotionless delivery is downright creepy. Does she have the chops to be the president? No. But neither does he and at this point this election is more like choosing a plug for a sinking ship than a captain to get us into port before we go under. Question: How the HELL can she keep a straight face when discussing law and order a few minutes after essentially disavowing due process? 

RESULT: Draw, with a slight advantage to Clinton.

Two more of these trainwrecks to go.

Get some popcorn… and Valium.

Dumpster Fire: Round 1

The 2016 Election and Total Freedom

We’ve moved beyond the, “lesser of two evils” model here in 2016. On one hand, I reject the hysterical fear mongering of the right which states that a Hillary presidency will lead to the National Guard busting in your front door to steal your guns while they force you to watch an atheist perform an abortion on your wife. I reject the laughably reactionary warning from the left that a Trump presidency will see, Free Guns for Toddlers stands on every corner being run by Klansmen against a backdrop of mile after mile of crucified immigrants. On the other hand, these cartoonish examples of extremes do not negate the fact that we have two choices which are doing their best to appeal to the extreme wings of their respective sides.

First of all, the decision not to cast my vote for Donald Trump has nothing to do with me wanting a Hillary presidency. That particular castigation has been thrown at me a number of times by rabid Trumpkins. No, I will not bend my knee and get in line with your incomprehensible lunacy so you can pretend you have a normal candidate for the next six months. You made this liberal bed, you hitched your wagons to this disingenuous star, you own it. Hell, your own man said you didn’t need us, so why do we need him?

Answer: we don’t. 

For the first time in my life as a voter, there is no lesser of two evils to choose from. They are equally as reprehensible. Thomas Sowell (one of the most brilliant men alive) said it best of Trump; “There was a time when someone who publicly mocked a handicapped man would have told us everything we needed to know about his character.” It is awfully apparent at this point, that the fact that he has said and done absolutely disgusting things over the past year is neither here nor there on the national stage. It doesn’t matter to his droves of followers who were basically equated with sociopaths by the man himself when he used the now infamous shooting-on-Fifth-Avenue line. He is a died in the wool liberal who has been a liberal his entire life. He walks back absolutely everything he says that gives me and other conservatives even the slightest glimpse of hope for his candidacy within hours of saying it. His body of work stands for itself and I don’t trust people who have made umpteen millions of dollars looking out for no one but themselves. So basically, I don’t trust millionaires, period.

Hillary is equally as nauseating. She will kowtow to special interests in a manner which would make a lobbyist blush out of thrombosis inducing cringiness. Every single move she has made over the past year is so painfully rife with pander that it is hard to take her seriously, even when she’s coughing uncontrollably. She is so loathed by her own side that she is being given a run for her money by a kindly old lunatic who looks like he’s perpetually frustrated with a jacket zipper stuck on a shirt button. Don’t misunderstand Bernie’s appeal. A very small number of his supporters are true socialists and an even smaller minority of those Bolsheviks actually have half a clue on what socialism is. He is appealing for one reason and one reason only to the majority of his supporters and moderate Democrats; he’s not her.

To reiterate my previous point: there is no lesser than equation in this election cycle.

When faced with the choice that Americans are going to have to make in November, it is easy to fall into despair. I did for a while. Until I realized the magnificent liberation that comes from being absolutely skunked. A line from Matthew Broderick’s character in the movie, The Freshman sums it up best; “there’s a kind of freedom in being completely screwed… because you know things can’t get any worse.” I can actually vote my conscience this go around. Quite frankly, the last two GOP nominees for president didn’t exactly light my sociopolitical, partisan world aflame. In fact, I wasn’t a fan of either. This year, I can honestly vote for who I think would be the best option for leader of the country. As a conservative, my vote doesn’t matter here in New England. That fact coupled with the awful choice equals total freedom. Ah, that makes it all a little better.

I will end up voting for whoever the Libertarian candidate is or perhaps write-in someone else. Because after careful consideration I’d rather throw away my vote than to cast it for someone my principles can’t reconcile. I’d rather know that I had nothing to do with our national nightmare than be part ot it. Sorry, Trumpkins and Hillbots. But my soul ain’t for sale.

Not this year anyway.

The 2016 Election and Total Freedom

Extreme Begets Extremes

I hate to sound like a liberal apologist. I loathe to sound like a left-winger. I cringe inwardly and outwardly when I think I remotely sound like a Salon.com contributor. But, every once in a while you have to set aside the icky feeling which springs from the question; do I sound like them, in order to make a point. With our current apparent choices for president this November, only one thing is absolutely clear; President Obama was a catastrophic cultural failure.

It is a common misconception to believe that the current state of American politics represents an unprecedented drop in political decorum. This is simply untrue. The attacks which were run against candidates and parties in the 19th century make today’s debacle seem tame by comparison. It cannot be ignored however, that while the current state of things is much different from the way it was over 116 years ago, there is still a tremendous amount of vitriol swirling around out there in the ether.

So we have what we have now. The extreme ends of both parties and ideologies are gaining an enormous amount of traction. As recently as the previous election cycle, the idea of a seriously contending Democratic candidate alluding to the virtues of socialism would have been unthinkable. At very least, the natural inclination to extol the virtues of socialism by the left and candidate would have been stifled to the point where the dirty word itself would merely have been alluded to in an attempt to pass ideology as sweet sounding policy. Now, we have a presumptive Democratic nominee who was almost beaten by a socialist. An openly socialist, socialist. It would be in the best interest of Hillary to recruit Bernie for VP but that would be career suicide for the man who built his campaign on the platform; ‘I am not like her.’ Then again, at his age, how much more career can there realistically be?

We have a presumptive Republican nominee who has been as far from conservative as a GOP candidate could possibly be. Lets use the previous comparison formula to keep things on an even playing field. As recently as the previous election cycle, the idea of a Republican candidate donating over a hundred thousand dollars to the person they are running against coupled with a solid liberal history would have been unthinkable. A candidate who literally told his supporters that they were stupid with his shooting-people-on-Fifth-Avenue analogy. There is no amount of logic, empirical evidence or outcome projections that can dislodge his rock solid support. His appeal is far easier to quantify than one would care to admit. It is not because he is a great candidate. It is not because he holds the same ideals as his supporters. It is not because he is a principled conservative. It is not because his vision for America is sustainable let alone attainable. It is because the human mind relegates reason in order to achieve its most sought after goal; instant gratification.

After almost two full terms of President Obama attempting to change the character of the United States, the frustration levels among some on the right-wing made thoughtful political calculation, analysis and reason seem almost nauseating when contrasted with the immediate release offered by a figurehead who says all of the awful things that swirled in their minds but were afraid to say. Pulling the lever for the Donald offered many disenchanted GOPers the instant gratification they desperately wanted which came after watching Romney flounder in ’12 coupled with the subsequent hurricane of Obama overreach. Donald Trump is not a presidential candidate. He is a drunken rant to your buddies after you’ve had a bad day. Or a bad seven years. The relative ease by which he sailed into the nomination is on par with the relative ease that the president’s ideological paradigm shift took root in the left over the past seven years. For every action … well you know the rest. There is an old adage which is said any number of different ways but it perfectly reflects the sentiment at the core of the Trump Train. See if this rings a bell:  I knew it was a bad idea then and I know it’s a bad idea now but man, did it feel good at the time.

There are two solid facts that need to be understood by anyone who supports a candidate who could be considered politically controversial:

  1. Political tides are cyclical. One always comes as a response to the previous.
  2. Smugness from the previous cycle amplifies the more destructive elements and voices from each subsequent cycle.

With Trump leading the charge at least in title, you can be sure that with or without a win in November and with the appeal of socialism among the young and the reckless that are just now graduating; the push back is going to be unthinkably extreme. I have a feeling that a lot of people are going to learn those two facts the hard way. But I guess it doesn’t matter because at the time it felt great. For some people at least.

 

 

Extreme Begets Extremes